I have conquered, be a-feared, be very a-feared. That is, if you live in places that are not the USA. For in that land I have been everywhere; I have seen the states united in all their glory (and often their smudgy, griminess, too). I have touched land in all of them (photos of the last state to succumb–do you think that’s the right phrase?–will be up tomorrow!) and they have known my wrath.
I must now set my eyes to lands and peoples more distant, with more exotic accents, with better beer, appreciation of football and history (not necessarily in that order)….
Yes, that could be taken as a threat. But, it is also fair warning. There is yet time to seek an injunction or learn to fire a small-caliber handgun. I’ll be seeing all of you soon, bwahahahaha.