So, I find myself at an audiion callback. In general, this is a great thing. However, these auditions happened to be in the middle of a very long national tour. Still, this is a good thing. The callback is going very well, they like my grasp of dialects, my physical performance, the fact that I do a lot of variety-entertainment stuff. Then we get to the part where they ask me for a tape demonstrating my stilt-walking ability.
Hmmm. I only packed 6 days worth of clothes, a few books, and my laptop. And this doesn’t even take into account the fact that I have very little stilt-walking on tape. I have a lot of juggling, a good amount of knife throwing and fire-eating, and all kinds of interactive corporate stuff on tape. Stilts? Not so much. So, of course, I say, “Certainly I can get a tape to you.”
I’m saying this as my inner self is screaming, “Da hell??? Where are you going to get a tape of you stilt-walking? You’re on the road with no stilts, no stilt pants, and almost no juggling stuff….”
No problem. It just takes one free day, say on a weekend. You put on some stilts made from stuff at the local hardware store. You go to a rec center in the area (because it is ice cold outside). You take a couple minutes of video and “viola!”
Thank goodness I had the presence of mind at the callback to say of the video, “…well, it won’t be great quality.” So my only disappointment is that there were no people around to interact with (damn 20-something weather). That’s the sort of thing that really sells variety arts performance. Oh well.
What the hell? These are search terms that people found A Clown in the Middle with today.
anna nicole clown face 20
anna nicole clown 6
ANNA NICOLE CLOWN FACE 3
anne nicole smith clown face 2
anna nichole clown 2
anna clown face 1
annanicole smith acting as a clown 1
What the hell? Do these people not have anything better to do? What exactly is the obsession with famous people who are famous for being famous? I don’t get it. There is something about the juxtaposition of Anna Nicole Smith & clown face that I really like, however.
That’s right, the middle of February. Winter. Much of the country is in a snow and ice death-grip. If I haven’t mentioned it, much of the country is really, really, silly cold. So, what does all this mean?
I need to join the ranks of…well, everyone. So, I just want it to be known that A Clown in the Middle strongly believes that this non-story should go away. We feel that the only way this can happen is for us to tell everyone that the death of ANNA NICOLE SMITH will not be exploited on this blog.
There is no way that ANNA NICOLE SMITH will be mentioned, even if a white Ford Bronco is involved. We stand with Wolf Blitzer of CNN in believing the only way to appropriately report this story with dignity, allowing the family a little privacy, is to splash the name ANNA NICOLE SMITH all over the place. And in Wolf’s case, add a nice collage of images of her face and breasts. WTG, Wolf.
So, once again, if you want stories of ANNA NICOLE SMITH, go, uh…everywhere else on the planet: newspaper, TV, radio, internet, whatever. You will get no ANNA NICOLE SMITH here.
It’s time to go back to the bliss of actually acting instead of doing my real job of auditioning. My UPTAs are done for the year and I guess it went okay. I didn’t receive as many callbacks as I would have liked, but who did (with the exception of number 346, perhaps–that guy must be awesome)? But the callbacks I did get went very well and I think there is a better than 50/50 chance that each company will offer me a job. Several companies just kept my resume, which could mean anything from nothing to everything, who knows.
Yes, I realise I was eating BBQ at B.B. King’s Blues Club in Memphis. This is not perhaps a “food first” place of business. I’ve been to B.B. King’s before, but never eaten–just listened to the blues while having an adult beverage. Well, this time I needed some food, so I thought I’d listen to the blues while having a little Memphis-style BBQ. Nice musical experience, not so nice with the food.